Day 9: 40 Days~
“If you can see beauty instead of ugliness, beauty will appear. Cease weeping over the mistakes of yesterday and steadfastly beholding the face of the great and divine Reality, walk in that Light wherein there is no darkness.” ~ Ernest Holmes
“This is the highest hope ever placed before the vision of man’s search for something that can make him whole.” ~Ernest Holmes
What is found in the darkness?
Good morning day! Today I woke up really quiet. I feel incredibly at peace. Last night I went to bed frightened. I was afraid. I was scared to be alone. It was the first time in months that I would have my apartment to myself.
Sitting in the darkness…
I was watching a movie last night on my laptop and the computer kept shutting down. It would not let me watch the movie. I kept finding myself in the darkness and wanting to be on the phone all night so that I could feel safe.
Why do we fear the darkness?
It is in the darkness where the truth resides. It is in the darkness where the pain lives. It is in those darkest hours where the lessons can be found. There is no light without darkness. We can’t just skip a step! It doesn’t work that way.
What frightened me about being alone?
This is what I am meditating on today…
What is frightening me? What frightens us?
For me, I believe that what frightens us is that we are being forced to face something… to face ourselves.
When we are alone this is where we must do the work. In stillness. In the darkness.
The word FORCED is interesting to me… being forced to face something… forced to look at something… forced to go within… forced to accept… forced to stop!
The body and mind are amazing creations… the body wants to do something but it cannot work without the mind sending a signal and giving the OK… signals and signs… we are constantly receiving messages and signs drawing our attention to something... but its really about the SOUL!
Are we paying attention to what the soul wants and needs. The soul feeds off of the darkness. This is where we must sit and really listen.
What we are looking for is found in the darkness… it is the very core of our soul. Here is where the truth lives… our souls… the darkness is our soul crying and communicating with us to pay attention. In the darkness we understand what we must do.
While I was reading this morning I came across this lovely prayer:
“Today, bright with hope and filled with promise, is mine.
Today my heart is without fear.
I have implicit confidence in the good, the enduring and the true.
Today I shall guard my thoughts and speech; I shall keep my consciousness steadfast with the realization that there is a spiritual Power upon which I may rely.
I shall turn resolutely to that Divine Source which knows no confusion, to that spiritual Center which knows no fear.
The Spirit is not afraid of anything; the Divine has no enemies; the Spirit knows no opposites.
I enter into a faith made perfect through love and confidence, an assurance made complete by the abandonment of myself to good.
Acknowledging good in all my ways, desiring only the good for others, I rest in calm assurance.
I believe in myself because I believe in God.
I believe in my destiny because I know that the Law of Good is operating through me.
I have confidence in the future and enthusiastic expectation of good things to come.
Therefore, I accept the fullness of life this moment.” Excerpt from This thing Called You by Ernest Holmes
Perhaps this is why I was afraid last night of the darkness. It might have to do with some of the choices that I have made… I am being (forced) a gentler word is “called…” I am being called to look at some things.
I am being called to look at some areas of my life.
I am being called to not run from the darkness.
I am being called to not fear the darkness.
I am being called to know that I am safe in the darkness.
I am safe.
Nothing can harm me.
So today I will hold that truth!
I AM RESTING IN CALM ASSURANCE... abandoning myself to good!
And I accept the fullness of my life in this moment.
And so it is~