No Day But Today~

"There's nothing to it – but to do it!"

Part of my writing process is to procrastinate a bit before I sit down to write… I pick up the house a little, make my bed - - attempt to create a space in my living room and then I finally sit my ass down with my thoughts…

I start by writing around thoughts and ideas and today it was notes from an interview I heard with Junot Diaz (which I can't wait to blog about - - he's fucking brilliant). So I just finished transcribing the notes from that discussion I heard with Junot and decided to play a musical to get me in the mood for writing and the soundtrack I selected is RENT…

I was going through the booklet that came with the cd and read the dedication to the creator of RENT Jonathan Larson - - it talked about his passion for life, creating music and art - - and what he wanted to leave behind for the world… the last line in the dedication reads:

"Jonathan's sudden, unexpected death on the very day his dream came true is a sobering reminder to make the most of the time we have. Listen to his music, reach out to community, and celebrate all the love in your life."

If you don't know the story about the creator of Rent – you should totally read it… the man died before his show went to Broadway - - a show that's been on Broadway for over ten years…

So today I'm thinking about what it means to:

Live our dreams…
Pursue our life's purpose…
Remove all obstacles…
STOP fighting inner demons…
Know our worth…
Know we're worthy…
Know what it is we are fighting for…because there ARE things worth fighting for…
Know what we want…
Never take NO for an answer…
Push forward no matter what…
Let go of people who are crutches…
Let go of people who are harmful to our health…

I'm thinking about how far I've come - - and how there's NO DAY BUT TODAY~

I had a conversation today with one of my closest friends - - one of those friends who knew me when…

She…
Knew me when my life was FULL of drama
Knew me when I never kept a promise
Knew me when I wanted to do a little bit of everything but never completed anything
Knew me when my life was upside down
Knew me when I was a disaster
Knew me when I lied to myself and loved me anyway
Knew me when I was hard on myself
Knew me when I was always angry and full of rage
Knew me when I was self destructive
Knew me when I didn't trust myself to make the right decisions and relied on my friends to help me process and make the right choice for MY life because I didn't know how to…

She's one of those friends who shoot from the hip… that friend who never tolerated my shit and called me on all of it…

It's so important to keep those people in our lives - - those who KNEW us when…

So out of the blue… I see a call on my cell coming in that's UNKNOWN… and of course I'm tempted to dodge the call wanting to hit END – you know those calls when you're hiding out from the bill collectors. Yeah those calls - - I know you know what I'm talking about…

And to my happy surprise it was my dear amiga Rie… and she is one of those friends who KNOWS me well. She and I met when I was the secretary of an elementary school and she taught 3rd grade ESL at a school in Rhode Island 13 years ago. We spent so much time together, movies, dinners, dancing, countless conversations, we ate lunch together daily at work, we were always at each others houses - - she got me through so many difficult moments – a true and brutally honest friend…

These days we speak only a few times a year… life and location does that… but she's still really good at sending me cards for Christmas and on birthdays… she has been there for me when it counts - - and on my end I try leave quick voicemail messages periodically just checking in… and this week was no different I sent her an email asking her to save the date for an event my friends are throwing me in June and I made the message really vague so she would HAVE to call me back to get the news in person…

It worked she called… we were on the phone for like 45 minutes it was sooooo wonderful to hear from her and catch up really quick. She told me she had just finished reading my article and I shared with her what has happened since… particularly the incredible opportunity that has come my way… (I will share with you guys soon)

And what she said surprised me and didn't…

She yelled – I could hear her excitement for me… she was like "Are you fucking kidding me~ I am so happy for you" I just smiled and laughed listening to how full of joy she was… and then she said, "YOU DID IT… you did what you said you were going to do… you stuck it out - - you didn't let anyone get in your way - - or words like I have said to you – words like get a real job – a steady job with benefits…" she said to me, "Alicia you did it!"

Just hearing that gave me pause because I am doing it - - there is NO DAY BUT TODAY~ and I am NOT done…

What are you doing with TODAY?

Peace~