Reflection~ What IS really important?

Before I share my blog I need a release: a free write…

I am so angry today…
Why can’t I shake you?
Why are you lingering?
Why don’t you just leave?
I LOVE BEING ALONE
I am angry with me…
For allowing you to invade MY - - SPACE…
Although time has passed…
I am no longer the same…
Like the child who has been robbed of their innocence…
Mine was taken from me…
I now see the world differently…
LOVE
That how I combat this…
This feeling…
This INVASION
Love myself through ALL MY PAIN…
I keep getting sucked back into this web…
I don’t want it in my life…
I don’t want poison…
My veins are FULL…
I release IT… I SURRENDER it all~
End of freewrite…

REFLECTION~

I have come a long way from my PEACEFUL space… that person I once was… I seem to be FAR from my “peace & love” writings of 2008.

I just looked at a few of my past blogs and find myself REFLECTING… analyzing where I’ve been… questioning:

Where am I headed?
WHAT IS IT THAT I AM DOING?
What’s it ALL FOR?

What I found to be important to me in 2008 and what I was on the constant search for was ALWAYS:

Truth
Trust
Faith
Love
Inner circle
Community
Bonds
LOVE
True friendships with women… (Fab, Joe, V, Ely, Emma, Court, Laleet, Kelly… just to name a few…)
VOICE… finding MY VOICE

I noticed today that I have I have lost myself somewhere on the journey…

I stopped my PRACTICE…

My meditations…

My prayers… I stopped feeding myself with all the positive and beautiful images that I used to surround myself with… this journey has transformed me… the harsh realities of the world has impacted me leaving an IMPRINT on my heart, mind and soul.

The things I found in 2008 still mean a lot to me… but I’ve changed in 2009 - - my search now is all about:

JUSTICE
EQUALITY
IN EQUALITY
IN JUSTICE
RIGHTS
HUMAN RIGHTS
WOMENS RIGHTS
CHILDRENS RIGHTS
EDUCATION
POVERTY
PROSTITUTION
HUMAN TRAFFICKING
SEXUAL TOURISM
SEXISM
RACISM
DISCRIMINATION

Which in most of the places I have been have NOT reaped positive benefits for those who are faced dealing with those issues…

I am more concerned now with helping communities… building communities… building a team of people who want to help communities…

Part of me misses the days where I meditated for the answers, but I realize today that I MAY NOT always have that extra two hours when I am traveling in the 3rd world...that I may JUST HAVE to sacrifice and stop mid prayer to fight for those who need my help… I may need to stop talking about what I need God to help me with and just get RIGHT TO the business of helping others… I must do what I was sent to do…

I am thinking about the woman I am - - and who I am becoming~

What are you thinking about?

Peace~