I was thinking about the people in my life who are the closest to me. I was thinking about - - who the people are who are in my inner circle. Who are my confidantes? Who are the people I can count on when I am in a jam. Who picks me up when I am down? Who do I trust with my life story? Who are the select few who have my phone number (my home number)?
I was at a good friend's house -- a woman who is definitely in my front row… I was resting on her bed and something made me get up to read some of the postings on her board in her home office when I came across this beautiful quote that I wanted to share:
Everyone Can't Be in Your Front Row
Life is a theater - invite your audience carefully.
Not everyone is spiritually healthy and mature enough to have a front row seat in our lives. There are some people in your life that need to be loved from a distance.
It's amazing what you can accomplish when you let go, or at least minimize your time with draining, negative, incompatible, not-going-anywhere relationships/friendships/fellowships!
Observe the relationships around you.
Pay attention to:
Which ones lift and which ones lean?
Which ones encourage and which ones discourage?
Which ones are on a path of growth uphill and which ones are going downhill?
When you leave certain people, do you feel better or feel worse?
Which ones always have drama or don't really understand, know and appreciate you and the gift that lies within you?
When you seek growth, peace of mind, love and truth, the easier it will become for you to decide who gets to sit in the FRONT ROW and who should be moved to the balcony of your life.
You cannot change the people around you...but you can change the people you are around! Ask Spirit for wisdom and discernment and choose wisely the people who sit in the front row of your life.
"Just because no one has shown up who can love you on your level, doesn't mean you sink to theirs!"
By: Unknown Author
I am very grateful for the people in my life who sit in the front row… you know who you are. :)
Who sits in your front row?
Peace~
Wednesday, December 26, 2007
Tuesday, December 25, 2007
I Won’t Fear Love~
I had a conversation with God today and he told me he loved me!
Do you fear love?
This evening I meditated on the word Unconditional Love: “it’s the acknowledging and accepting of the presence of the divine - - it’s selfless giving and openness to receiving”
There was a moment in my life that I was truly AFRAID to be LOVED UNCONDITIONALLY - - afraid of what it would do to me if I had it or lost it.
The ideas that kept me afraid were:
That love is painful
That love hurts
That love betrays
That love beats
That love disappoints
That love demeans
That love belittles
That love breaks
That true love doesn’t exist
That I would never be loved
That I would never find love
That love destroys
That love leaves
That love lies
That love dies
That love ends
I am forced to look at where I have been and where I am headed. I must ask myself - - am I open to all of the experiences of my life? Will I allow opportunities to pass me by? Will I allow my soul mate to just pass me on the street without even so much as a hello?
I can not control what is happening around me - - but I will not run away from love. I won’t fear love.
In the middle of reading my meditation on Unconditional Love - -something wonderful happened. - - I got a myspace email from God. It stopped me dead in my tracks - - I was frozen… I can admit it frightened me a little - - but I shook it off and realized who the message was from and the true intention behind it. I just sat there with these fabulous BCBG high heeled stilettos - - because at the precise moment I received the email - - my cousin was giving me a pair of heels as a gift.
God wrote:
“I think often times in our day to day functions
we often forget these things
life is beautiful and should be enjoyed
we should take our interactions with others
and hold them close
this is very important
if no one has told you today
let me be the first to say
I love you”
My instinct was to respond with the unoriginal “I love you too.” I didn’t do that…. I feared love. Why do we get so wrapped up in timing or the right time that we think it’s appropriate for things to happen in our lives?
When you come face to face with love you must rise to greet it.
You just trust and know - - that at that moment you are in unconditional love. What about just hearing and saying I love you and not worrying about what it all means – where its going… why not just trust that there is something higher going on - - can we just accept being loved just for being who we are - - in THIS moment. No questions asked - - no questioning of intentions or expectations… no digging – no credit checks or references necessary - no searching – no fantasies or illusions - -just being able to receive love - - the love that we are worthy of.
I won’t fear love.
And to God I respond:
Allow me to accept the love you give me.
Thank you for loving me… I’m not afraid of your love. Thank you for loving me without conditions or preconceived notions or some fantastical idea of how this will all turn out.
And if no one has told YOU today…allow me to be the first person to tell you I love YOU!
With love,
Diosa
Iyanla writes: “when I am able to convince myself that no matter what I do - - I am still not good enough - - unconditional love will show me the truth!”
I realize that I have loved with conditions that I be loved in return - - that if I am giving love I should receive it. How about just loving for the love of loving - - without getting love in return. Can we just love for the satisfaction of giving it? Loving without expecting certain responses or reactions from people - - I often expected something in return for loving my people. Now I can just love them anyway - - without getting that I love you back… I won’t fear love.
It’s enough to know that I love me and I know that I am loved.
I guess now I’m not afraid of love… I know that I am worthy of love WE ALL ARE - - I accept that love is my state of mind -- with these letters that I have been writing - - I have been expressing the deepest form of self love…I was born to love and I act and speak in love. I admit to myself what I really want in my life. Love is always present in my life. I love myself and others unconditionally. Love is where I live!
There is only one love!
As I accept, acknowledge and embrace the source of unconditional love, it becomes the guiding force of my life
Have you told someone you loved them today?
Do you fear love?
Peace~
Do you fear love?
This evening I meditated on the word Unconditional Love: “it’s the acknowledging and accepting of the presence of the divine - - it’s selfless giving and openness to receiving”
There was a moment in my life that I was truly AFRAID to be LOVED UNCONDITIONALLY - - afraid of what it would do to me if I had it or lost it.
The ideas that kept me afraid were:
That love is painful
That love hurts
That love betrays
That love beats
That love disappoints
That love demeans
That love belittles
That love breaks
That true love doesn’t exist
That I would never be loved
That I would never find love
That love destroys
That love leaves
That love lies
That love dies
That love ends
I am forced to look at where I have been and where I am headed. I must ask myself - - am I open to all of the experiences of my life? Will I allow opportunities to pass me by? Will I allow my soul mate to just pass me on the street without even so much as a hello?
I can not control what is happening around me - - but I will not run away from love. I won’t fear love.
In the middle of reading my meditation on Unconditional Love - -something wonderful happened. - - I got a myspace email from God. It stopped me dead in my tracks - - I was frozen… I can admit it frightened me a little - - but I shook it off and realized who the message was from and the true intention behind it. I just sat there with these fabulous BCBG high heeled stilettos - - because at the precise moment I received the email - - my cousin was giving me a pair of heels as a gift.
God wrote:
“I think often times in our day to day functions
we often forget these things
life is beautiful and should be enjoyed
we should take our interactions with others
and hold them close
this is very important
if no one has told you today
let me be the first to say
I love you”
My instinct was to respond with the unoriginal “I love you too.” I didn’t do that…. I feared love. Why do we get so wrapped up in timing or the right time that we think it’s appropriate for things to happen in our lives?
When you come face to face with love you must rise to greet it.
You just trust and know - - that at that moment you are in unconditional love. What about just hearing and saying I love you and not worrying about what it all means – where its going… why not just trust that there is something higher going on - - can we just accept being loved just for being who we are - - in THIS moment. No questions asked - - no questioning of intentions or expectations… no digging – no credit checks or references necessary - no searching – no fantasies or illusions - -just being able to receive love - - the love that we are worthy of.
I won’t fear love.
And to God I respond:
Allow me to accept the love you give me.
Thank you for loving me… I’m not afraid of your love. Thank you for loving me without conditions or preconceived notions or some fantastical idea of how this will all turn out.
And if no one has told YOU today…allow me to be the first person to tell you I love YOU!
With love,
Diosa
Iyanla writes: “when I am able to convince myself that no matter what I do - - I am still not good enough - - unconditional love will show me the truth!”
I realize that I have loved with conditions that I be loved in return - - that if I am giving love I should receive it. How about just loving for the love of loving - - without getting love in return. Can we just love for the satisfaction of giving it? Loving without expecting certain responses or reactions from people - - I often expected something in return for loving my people. Now I can just love them anyway - - without getting that I love you back… I won’t fear love.
It’s enough to know that I love me and I know that I am loved.
I guess now I’m not afraid of love… I know that I am worthy of love WE ALL ARE - - I accept that love is my state of mind -- with these letters that I have been writing - - I have been expressing the deepest form of self love…I was born to love and I act and speak in love. I admit to myself what I really want in my life. Love is always present in my life. I love myself and others unconditionally. Love is where I live!
There is only one love!
As I accept, acknowledge and embrace the source of unconditional love, it becomes the guiding force of my life
Have you told someone you loved them today?
Do you fear love?
Peace~
Monday, December 24, 2007
With OR Without You!
Its Christmas Eve… and I am alone… I have sent my daughter to her fathers for two weeks… I am sad because I will miss her but I am happy that I will have some me time…
Today I have been thinking about all the things that bring me JOY…
My daughter is the first thing that comes to my mind…
We had the best weekend together we watched: Rent, Fame, and Purple Rain… any time with her brings me joy. Just laying in bed for two days straight watching movies – eating all of our meals in our pajamas… it’s THE LIFE… Other things that bring me joy are time spent with my family, my parents, my sisters, my brother, my cousins, and all of my relatives and friends.
Just now I was on the bus and I was filled with joy watching these two girls talking about me - -the older girl was pointing at my height and I just smiled at them and I could tell that in that moment… I shared my joy with them and they shared their joy with me… the other thing that filled me with joy was while I was writing this morning I was watching a few U2 and Green Day videos and my daughter just peeked out of the bathroom and smiled… I know Green Day is her favorite so I was filled with joy listening to her sing… HOLIDAY…
When we make someone else responsible for being - - everything…
I could be sad that my baby girl has left me alone for Christmas. But I’m not sad - - I am filled with JOY because we are both doing what we want to do. We are doing what brings us joy. Me I get to write for two weeks GUILT FREE and she gets to get spoiled and some deserved rest.
Making someone else responsible for being our everything… for being our every happiness…
Giving ourselves fully to someone in THAT way… (And you give…. And you give…. And you give yourself away…) this song kept playing in my head as I wrote…
With our Without You by U2…
Giving ourselves away…
Happiness does not sustain me - - joy fills me.
Today I was reading about the difference between JOY and HAPPINESS…
“JOY is an internal process grounded in the knowledge of spiritual truth, the ability to trust, the wisdom of the divine, and faith in the process of life.” Iyanla
Vs.
HAPPINESS which relies on events, things and people who MAY or MAY NOT show up in our lives…
Where JOY lasts… Happiness comes and goes… (we can buy things to make us happy, we may look to lovers to satisfy us – we may even look for happiness in outside forces). Joy is KNOWING that every we do have today - - is FINE just as it is - - RIGHT NOW in this moment! (With or without you)
Happiness HOPES that the thing we need will come soon… (That he/she/that thing - - that it will show up to make us happy).
No matter what I am going through - - I am full of joy… with or without you…
It’s not depending one something or someone outside of us to give us this feeling.
I was thinking about me in a relationship… I was considering which feeling state I would welcome in my life…
Me telling him: you bring me joy vs. you make soooo happy.
YOU make ME so happy – implies that if YOU leave me – YOU take all that makes me happy. Therefore I am left UNHAPPY. I’ve just given YOU complete control over my happiness - - I have made you responsible for making me happy and I rely on YOU to fill that.
But if I am FULL of joy - - and say to YOU - - you bring me joy… I am telling you that you ADD to something that already exists within me - - and if YOU DO LEAVE me… my joy stays with me. (With or without you)
This doesn’t mean that all will be great all the time or that every moment will be a joyful one… it doesn’t mean that things won’t make us angry - - it just means that - - when the sh&^ does hit the fan and it will – that no matter what we KEEP our joy.
Joy is the freedom and ability to make choices in the face of adversity - - accepting that we are on a journey and that nothing can stop us. It’s accepting that no one can take our joy.
I’ve been searching for the wrong thing - - looking for happiness. When its joy that I want to be filled with.
“Joy is what I create, attract and use to sustain myself at every moment of the day…”
“Joy begins within…”
“Joy is not dependent on people or circumstances…” Iyanla
When everything around me seems to be in disarray or not going very well… the joy inside me gets me through it - - I know that I am being taken care of - - this KNOWING brings me great joy.
I have spent the better portion of my life wanting to just be happy… stolen temporary moments that expire - - when what I truly want is constant joy - - a joy that fills me… and these days I am giving me JOY.
Joy can sustain me through anything and everything…
One heart, One hope, One love…
Joy to the world… and peace on earth… MERRY CHRISTMAS everyone! (And everything you do or don’t celebrate… sending you wishes for JOY in your lives)
What brings you joy?
Peace~
Today I have been thinking about all the things that bring me JOY…
My daughter is the first thing that comes to my mind…
We had the best weekend together we watched: Rent, Fame, and Purple Rain… any time with her brings me joy. Just laying in bed for two days straight watching movies – eating all of our meals in our pajamas… it’s THE LIFE… Other things that bring me joy are time spent with my family, my parents, my sisters, my brother, my cousins, and all of my relatives and friends.
Just now I was on the bus and I was filled with joy watching these two girls talking about me - -the older girl was pointing at my height and I just smiled at them and I could tell that in that moment… I shared my joy with them and they shared their joy with me… the other thing that filled me with joy was while I was writing this morning I was watching a few U2 and Green Day videos and my daughter just peeked out of the bathroom and smiled… I know Green Day is her favorite so I was filled with joy listening to her sing… HOLIDAY…
When we make someone else responsible for being - - everything…
I could be sad that my baby girl has left me alone for Christmas. But I’m not sad - - I am filled with JOY because we are both doing what we want to do. We are doing what brings us joy. Me I get to write for two weeks GUILT FREE and she gets to get spoiled and some deserved rest.
Making someone else responsible for being our everything… for being our every happiness…
Giving ourselves fully to someone in THAT way… (And you give…. And you give…. And you give yourself away…) this song kept playing in my head as I wrote…
With our Without You by U2…
Giving ourselves away…
Happiness does not sustain me - - joy fills me.
Today I was reading about the difference between JOY and HAPPINESS…
“JOY is an internal process grounded in the knowledge of spiritual truth, the ability to trust, the wisdom of the divine, and faith in the process of life.” Iyanla
Vs.
HAPPINESS which relies on events, things and people who MAY or MAY NOT show up in our lives…
Where JOY lasts… Happiness comes and goes… (we can buy things to make us happy, we may look to lovers to satisfy us – we may even look for happiness in outside forces). Joy is KNOWING that every we do have today - - is FINE just as it is - - RIGHT NOW in this moment! (With or without you)
Happiness HOPES that the thing we need will come soon… (That he/she/that thing - - that it will show up to make us happy).
No matter what I am going through - - I am full of joy… with or without you…
It’s not depending one something or someone outside of us to give us this feeling.
I was thinking about me in a relationship… I was considering which feeling state I would welcome in my life…
Me telling him: you bring me joy vs. you make soooo happy.
YOU make ME so happy – implies that if YOU leave me – YOU take all that makes me happy. Therefore I am left UNHAPPY. I’ve just given YOU complete control over my happiness - - I have made you responsible for making me happy and I rely on YOU to fill that.
But if I am FULL of joy - - and say to YOU - - you bring me joy… I am telling you that you ADD to something that already exists within me - - and if YOU DO LEAVE me… my joy stays with me. (With or without you)
This doesn’t mean that all will be great all the time or that every moment will be a joyful one… it doesn’t mean that things won’t make us angry - - it just means that - - when the sh&^ does hit the fan and it will – that no matter what we KEEP our joy.
Joy is the freedom and ability to make choices in the face of adversity - - accepting that we are on a journey and that nothing can stop us. It’s accepting that no one can take our joy.
I’ve been searching for the wrong thing - - looking for happiness. When its joy that I want to be filled with.
“Joy is what I create, attract and use to sustain myself at every moment of the day…”
“Joy begins within…”
“Joy is not dependent on people or circumstances…” Iyanla
When everything around me seems to be in disarray or not going very well… the joy inside me gets me through it - - I know that I am being taken care of - - this KNOWING brings me great joy.
I have spent the better portion of my life wanting to just be happy… stolen temporary moments that expire - - when what I truly want is constant joy - - a joy that fills me… and these days I am giving me JOY.
Joy can sustain me through anything and everything…
One heart, One hope, One love…
Joy to the world… and peace on earth… MERRY CHRISTMAS everyone! (And everything you do or don’t celebrate… sending you wishes for JOY in your lives)
What brings you joy?
Peace~
Sunday, December 23, 2007
I Make NO Apologies~
Are people willing to see?
Are people willing to be open?
Listening vs. hearing…
Are people willing to accept responsibility for their role?
What if one never accepts responsibility for what they have done to offend us?
My letters…
I have spent the past week with these thoughts and feelings about my letters…my sharing them… going through some self doubt… Someone close to me has been warning me all through my writing process that I should reconsider what I publish about my life… that I shouldn’t share what I have been sharing…that I need to be careful not to alienate myself from those I love… that I need to be careful with my words - - that I don’t want enemies… that I may end up alone.
People will be angry and may not like what I have to say but I can not stop speaking my truth…
How does this process serve?
Why now?
I was told: “My words are bullshit…sounds like a bunch of bullshit…”
Are you listening to the words that are coming out of my mouth?
What do you hear when I speak?
What do you hear when you read my words?
What do you believe to be the truth about me and where I am coming from?
I’ve read somewhere that people in general filter out a lot of what is said to them in conversation - - that we’re generally terrible listeners hearing a small percentage of what is actually being said.
I am so guilty of this.
When I was younger if I was in debate with someone – the other person could be in mid sentence – mid thought explaining or defending their position - - stressing a point… and I would be caught somewhere in my own thought forming my rebuttal - - reciting it in my mind so it comes out exactly the way I wanted it to.
These days I just tell people to keep repeating what they say to me over and over again until I have fully processed it. It’s more important for me to listen than it is to be heard…
Today I am feeling that I make no apologies for my words…
I make no apologies for the way I choose to heal and deal with my history… with MY story… I have NO FEAR of seeing myself, knowing myself, and being my Divine Self. Thank you creator for showing ME… I am growing into my full potential…
I am expanding beyond the limits I have placed on me - - I am growing past the limits I have allowed others to place on me. I am expanding my understanding of the truth, my experience of joy and how I love… One must be willing to expand… to be open to the process of growing.
“Life is a process of growing and outgrowing and growing some more…”
And this is exactly what I am going to continue doing. I keep moving forward - - honoring my process - - even when others can’t understand why it is I do what I do… even when people don’t honor me… I keep moving forward… keep doing what I’m doing…
My worth is not attached or contingent upon being forgiven… I have made penance for my sins… I forgive me for the errors of my ways… there will be no lashings…or crucifixion for the words I put on the page.
I was sad yesterday - - after a conversation with someone in my life… but I realize I must grow through this. Allow it to evolve… be patient that all will work out the way it is supposed to. I must be patient and faith filled. I am feeling quite drained at the moment.
When people don’t own their part, acknowledge or recognize their role in what has happened… there is nothing I can do about that.
What do you see when you look in the mirror?
Are we better than the person right beside us?
Are we better than the homeless man on the train?
Have you never made a mistake?
Are you perfect?
Who do we think we are?
Who are we to pass judgments?
Why are we so self righteous?
My purpose and intention for sharing my truth and sharing my indiscretions is not to try to convince someone of their past - - or to get someone to see what they may not be ready or willing to see or hear… one must be open… its about dealing with my past and healing and growing through it.
One must be willing – are we willing to grow beyond where we are?
Today I will seek the truth about myself and live the truth of my being….
I’m a work in progress!
Peace~
Are people willing to be open?
Listening vs. hearing…
Are people willing to accept responsibility for their role?
What if one never accepts responsibility for what they have done to offend us?
My letters…
I have spent the past week with these thoughts and feelings about my letters…my sharing them… going through some self doubt… Someone close to me has been warning me all through my writing process that I should reconsider what I publish about my life… that I shouldn’t share what I have been sharing…that I need to be careful not to alienate myself from those I love… that I need to be careful with my words - - that I don’t want enemies… that I may end up alone.
People will be angry and may not like what I have to say but I can not stop speaking my truth…
How does this process serve?
Why now?
I was told: “My words are bullshit…sounds like a bunch of bullshit…”
Are you listening to the words that are coming out of my mouth?
What do you hear when I speak?
What do you hear when you read my words?
What do you believe to be the truth about me and where I am coming from?
I’ve read somewhere that people in general filter out a lot of what is said to them in conversation - - that we’re generally terrible listeners hearing a small percentage of what is actually being said.
I am so guilty of this.
When I was younger if I was in debate with someone – the other person could be in mid sentence – mid thought explaining or defending their position - - stressing a point… and I would be caught somewhere in my own thought forming my rebuttal - - reciting it in my mind so it comes out exactly the way I wanted it to.
These days I just tell people to keep repeating what they say to me over and over again until I have fully processed it. It’s more important for me to listen than it is to be heard…
Today I am feeling that I make no apologies for my words…
I make no apologies for the way I choose to heal and deal with my history… with MY story… I have NO FEAR of seeing myself, knowing myself, and being my Divine Self. Thank you creator for showing ME… I am growing into my full potential…
I am expanding beyond the limits I have placed on me - - I am growing past the limits I have allowed others to place on me. I am expanding my understanding of the truth, my experience of joy and how I love… One must be willing to expand… to be open to the process of growing.
“Life is a process of growing and outgrowing and growing some more…”
And this is exactly what I am going to continue doing. I keep moving forward - - honoring my process - - even when others can’t understand why it is I do what I do… even when people don’t honor me… I keep moving forward… keep doing what I’m doing…
My worth is not attached or contingent upon being forgiven… I have made penance for my sins… I forgive me for the errors of my ways… there will be no lashings…or crucifixion for the words I put on the page.
I was sad yesterday - - after a conversation with someone in my life… but I realize I must grow through this. Allow it to evolve… be patient that all will work out the way it is supposed to. I must be patient and faith filled. I am feeling quite drained at the moment.
When people don’t own their part, acknowledge or recognize their role in what has happened… there is nothing I can do about that.
What do you see when you look in the mirror?
Are we better than the person right beside us?
Are we better than the homeless man on the train?
Have you never made a mistake?
Are you perfect?
Who do we think we are?
Who are we to pass judgments?
Why are we so self righteous?
My purpose and intention for sharing my truth and sharing my indiscretions is not to try to convince someone of their past - - or to get someone to see what they may not be ready or willing to see or hear… one must be open… its about dealing with my past and healing and growing through it.
One must be willing – are we willing to grow beyond where we are?
Today I will seek the truth about myself and live the truth of my being….
I’m a work in progress!
Peace~
An Organized Mess…
“Get it together…”
“Everything happens for a reason…”
“All will be revealed in due time…”
“You can’t move forward unless you look backwards…”
All expressions said to me on one occasion or another…
A lot of my days used to start off and end with the words:
“Today was the day from hell!”
Whenever I would meet up with my best friend I would start off the conversation the same way… and then I would just go on and on about how unfair life was - - how miserable my life was - - complaining about an unfulfilling job and what ever it was I was rambling about in my description of this day from hell. And she would always tell me, there is a reason for everything… there is a lesson in this… I was listening to the words but missing the message.
My life was exactly the way I was painting it… because I was the artist… at any moment I could have chosen a different brush and color for a more precise stroke… or I could have trashed the painting and started fresh with a new canvas… but I kept painting over the same piece over and over again… it was full of reds, oranges, yellows… the picture resembled FIRE… my moment in hell. I was in pain when I was having days from hell. I was in internal hell and the fire was getting hotter and hotter. I wasn’t sure how I was going to get out of it – I kept painting me there.
We develop in order – exactly when we are supposed to - - everything happens right on time…
I was unfolding right on time… I needed to be in hell to decide for myself if THAT was the way I wanted to continue living… do I want to live in hell - - or paint my way out of hell.
My days started changing… I am not sure when it happened - - when the change in me started happening… but I was having less days from hell and more days filled with happiness. I guess it must have started when I realized I was born to write. I read today that my force… assures me that the divine plan for my life… will unfold in an orderly manner according to my level of development…
How many times have I thought I was ready only to find out later that I was NOT ready… when I fall - - that too was in ORDER - - I needed to have those days from hell so that I could continue to keep getting ready…
The word I am meditating on today is ORDER!
I read today that: “the order of my physical environment is a reflection of the order and state of my mind” it went on to say, “A clear and opened mind is evidenced by a clean and orderly environment.”
I disagree with this - - and agree with it… I feel like a clean environment is only clean on the surface - - I take huge offense to this… that somehow someone who lives in a neat and orderly space is more open than I because their space is clean.
This is an illusion!
The most immaculate space can be the most miserable environment with the darkest of emotions.
So if my home is disorderly (and yes my house IS - - I collect research so I have tons of paper work and am surrounded by books in my space) am I to take this to mean that I am somehow blocking myself. I agree that a cluttered and disorderly mind would allow for blocks… but that my space would imply that I have it less together than a person with an orderly house… I can’t agree. I pride myself in calling me “An Organized Mess.” :)
My personal belief is that I prefer to clear out the garbage and mess on the inside before even tackling with the crap that surrounds my house. But that’s just me.
Of course if you enter a clean house - - free of clutter - - with clear space… it gives off the vibe of WOW they must really have it together - - look at how they live… so would this mean you walk into my space and it WOW she’s a hot mess and is far from having it together?
I went on to read: “the condition or order of the environment demonstrates what I have learned, what I am thinking and what I am ready to receive.”
I definitely agree with this… I know that for me I will and am getting here. The place where I am physically, mentally, and emotionally IS a reflection of the order or disorder in my thoughts, beliefs and emotions… but in some cases the cleanliness of spaces is a cover for the real mess that resides in the crevices…
Order for me means that I am exactly where I need to be… in this moment in time.
I can admit that my life in some ways is still in disorder - - there is still work I need to do. For me to have order - - I must get me in order and I will continue to do the work to get me in order.
I realize that my life is being ordered when I see and recognize that I am exactly where I need to be – doing what I am supposed to do and I know that everything I need will be provided.
For this I am so grateful.
Now my paintings are filled still with reds, oranges and yellows - - and those colors symbolize the sunset for me… the end of an amazing day filled with purples, pinks, sky blues…
What does order mean for you?
How does order show up in you life?
Peace~
“Everything happens for a reason…”
“All will be revealed in due time…”
“You can’t move forward unless you look backwards…”
All expressions said to me on one occasion or another…
A lot of my days used to start off and end with the words:
“Today was the day from hell!”
Whenever I would meet up with my best friend I would start off the conversation the same way… and then I would just go on and on about how unfair life was - - how miserable my life was - - complaining about an unfulfilling job and what ever it was I was rambling about in my description of this day from hell. And she would always tell me, there is a reason for everything… there is a lesson in this… I was listening to the words but missing the message.
My life was exactly the way I was painting it… because I was the artist… at any moment I could have chosen a different brush and color for a more precise stroke… or I could have trashed the painting and started fresh with a new canvas… but I kept painting over the same piece over and over again… it was full of reds, oranges, yellows… the picture resembled FIRE… my moment in hell. I was in pain when I was having days from hell. I was in internal hell and the fire was getting hotter and hotter. I wasn’t sure how I was going to get out of it – I kept painting me there.
We develop in order – exactly when we are supposed to - - everything happens right on time…
I was unfolding right on time… I needed to be in hell to decide for myself if THAT was the way I wanted to continue living… do I want to live in hell - - or paint my way out of hell.
My days started changing… I am not sure when it happened - - when the change in me started happening… but I was having less days from hell and more days filled with happiness. I guess it must have started when I realized I was born to write. I read today that my force… assures me that the divine plan for my life… will unfold in an orderly manner according to my level of development…
How many times have I thought I was ready only to find out later that I was NOT ready… when I fall - - that too was in ORDER - - I needed to have those days from hell so that I could continue to keep getting ready…
The word I am meditating on today is ORDER!
I read today that: “the order of my physical environment is a reflection of the order and state of my mind” it went on to say, “A clear and opened mind is evidenced by a clean and orderly environment.”
I disagree with this - - and agree with it… I feel like a clean environment is only clean on the surface - - I take huge offense to this… that somehow someone who lives in a neat and orderly space is more open than I because their space is clean.
This is an illusion!
The most immaculate space can be the most miserable environment with the darkest of emotions.
So if my home is disorderly (and yes my house IS - - I collect research so I have tons of paper work and am surrounded by books in my space) am I to take this to mean that I am somehow blocking myself. I agree that a cluttered and disorderly mind would allow for blocks… but that my space would imply that I have it less together than a person with an orderly house… I can’t agree. I pride myself in calling me “An Organized Mess.” :)
My personal belief is that I prefer to clear out the garbage and mess on the inside before even tackling with the crap that surrounds my house. But that’s just me.
Of course if you enter a clean house - - free of clutter - - with clear space… it gives off the vibe of WOW they must really have it together - - look at how they live… so would this mean you walk into my space and it WOW she’s a hot mess and is far from having it together?
I went on to read: “the condition or order of the environment demonstrates what I have learned, what I am thinking and what I am ready to receive.”
I definitely agree with this… I know that for me I will and am getting here. The place where I am physically, mentally, and emotionally IS a reflection of the order or disorder in my thoughts, beliefs and emotions… but in some cases the cleanliness of spaces is a cover for the real mess that resides in the crevices…
Order for me means that I am exactly where I need to be… in this moment in time.
I can admit that my life in some ways is still in disorder - - there is still work I need to do. For me to have order - - I must get me in order and I will continue to do the work to get me in order.
I realize that my life is being ordered when I see and recognize that I am exactly where I need to be – doing what I am supposed to do and I know that everything I need will be provided.
For this I am so grateful.
Now my paintings are filled still with reds, oranges and yellows - - and those colors symbolize the sunset for me… the end of an amazing day filled with purples, pinks, sky blues…
What does order mean for you?
How does order show up in you life?
Peace~
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
Like a bird in the sky…
Everybody’s FREEEEEE to feel good!
It's done. I did it. The moment I finished it…
I was walking with Chermelle last night after a very productive writing session. And I just looked at her and said. IT'S DONE! It's no longer inside of me. I no longer have to carry it.
I felt really light in my chest...
I was weightless, unburdened - - FLYING!!!
Everything looked so different to me in that moment.
Chermelle needed to remind me of what I looked like yesterday - - she said I was smiling, that I felt liberated. She said I told her, it felt good, so good in fact that it was the first time I'd ever felt that feeling of goodness.
I felt great.
I felt that it was gone, done, completed - - the poison is no longer inside of me!
I felt emptied of it.
I feel free.
I feel good.
The song that came to mind was EVERYBODY'S FREE…to feel good!
Freedom is not a moment or an experience…
Freedom is not something that can be given to us.
Freedom is a state of being. It's not something anyone can give us.
Freedom is something unexplainable – something that is felt in the mind, spirit and soul and I felt it all at the same time. It was an incredible moment. An emotional moment – I'm somehow different NOW…
My chest feels clear…
I feel open…
I can breathe.
With every breathe I take it feels different – freeing me even more…
I have never felt this free…
There were lines from that song "Right to be wrong" that spoke to me:
I've got a right to be wrong
My mistakes will make me strong
I'm stepping out into the great unknown
I'm feeling wings though I've never flown
I've got a right to be wrong
I've been held down too long
I've got to break free
So I can finally breathe
You're entitled to your opinion
But it's really my decision
I can't turn back I'm on a mission
If you care don't you dare blur my vision
Whatever's out there waiting for me
I'm going to face it willingly…
I was left feeling relieved… ready… I'm like a bird…
This is what I said last night: "Today is the moment of my transformation - - today is the first day of my life. I see things so differently now. I'm unblocked - - I AM FREE!"
This is a feeling I want to hold onto for as long as I can…
I no longer feel pain
I no longer feel hurt
I no longer feel guilt
I no longer feel shame
For this and for every thing that I receive I am so grateful!
I am FINALLY free…
This is what freedom feels like…
This poem summarizes what I feel brilliantly:
Ego Tripping , by Nikki Giovanni (1973)
I was born in the Congo.
I walked to the Fertile Crescent and built the sphinx.
I designed a pyramid so tough that a star
that only glows every one hundred years falls
into the center giving divine perfect light.
I am bad.
I sat on the throne
drinking nectar with Allah.
I got hot and sent an ice age to Europe
to cool my thirst.
My oldest daughter is Nefertiti.
The tears from my birth pains
created the Nile.
I am a beautiful woman.
I gazed on the forest and burned
out the Sahara desert.
With a packet of goat's meat
and a change of clothes,
I crossed it in two hours.
I am a gazelle so swift,
so swift you can't catch me.
For a birthday present when he was three,
I gave my son Hannibal an elephant.
He gave me Rome for mother's day.
My strength flows ever on.
My son Noah built an ark and
I stood proudly at the helm
as we sailed on a soft summer day.
I turned myself into myself and was Jesus.
Men intone my loving name.
All praises all praises,
I am the one who would save.
I sowed diamonds in my back yard.
My bowels deliver uranium.
The filings from my fingernails are
semi-precious jewels.
On a trip north,
I caught a cold and blew
my nose giving oil to the Arab world.
I am so hip even my errors are correct.
I sailed west to reach east and had to round off
the earth as I went.
The hair from my head thinned and gold was laid
across three continents.
I am so perfect so divine so ethereal so surreal.
I cannot be comprehended except by my permission.
I mean...I...can fly
like a bird in the sky...
HAVE YOU EVER FELT THIS?
Peace~
It's done. I did it. The moment I finished it…
I was walking with Chermelle last night after a very productive writing session. And I just looked at her and said. IT'S DONE! It's no longer inside of me. I no longer have to carry it.
I felt really light in my chest...
I was weightless, unburdened - - FLYING!!!
Everything looked so different to me in that moment.
Chermelle needed to remind me of what I looked like yesterday - - she said I was smiling, that I felt liberated. She said I told her, it felt good, so good in fact that it was the first time I'd ever felt that feeling of goodness.
I felt great.
I felt that it was gone, done, completed - - the poison is no longer inside of me!
I felt emptied of it.
I feel free.
I feel good.
The song that came to mind was EVERYBODY'S FREE…to feel good!
Freedom is not a moment or an experience…
Freedom is not something that can be given to us.
Freedom is a state of being. It's not something anyone can give us.
Freedom is something unexplainable – something that is felt in the mind, spirit and soul and I felt it all at the same time. It was an incredible moment. An emotional moment – I'm somehow different NOW…
My chest feels clear…
I feel open…
I can breathe.
With every breathe I take it feels different – freeing me even more…
I have never felt this free…
There were lines from that song "Right to be wrong" that spoke to me:
I've got a right to be wrong
My mistakes will make me strong
I'm stepping out into the great unknown
I'm feeling wings though I've never flown
I've got a right to be wrong
I've been held down too long
I've got to break free
So I can finally breathe
You're entitled to your opinion
But it's really my decision
I can't turn back I'm on a mission
If you care don't you dare blur my vision
Whatever's out there waiting for me
I'm going to face it willingly…
I was left feeling relieved… ready… I'm like a bird…
This is what I said last night: "Today is the moment of my transformation - - today is the first day of my life. I see things so differently now. I'm unblocked - - I AM FREE!"
This is a feeling I want to hold onto for as long as I can…
I no longer feel pain
I no longer feel hurt
I no longer feel guilt
I no longer feel shame
For this and for every thing that I receive I am so grateful!
I am FINALLY free…
This is what freedom feels like…
This poem summarizes what I feel brilliantly:
Ego Tripping , by Nikki Giovanni (1973)
I was born in the Congo.
I walked to the Fertile Crescent and built the sphinx.
I designed a pyramid so tough that a star
that only glows every one hundred years falls
into the center giving divine perfect light.
I am bad.
I sat on the throne
drinking nectar with Allah.
I got hot and sent an ice age to Europe
to cool my thirst.
My oldest daughter is Nefertiti.
The tears from my birth pains
created the Nile.
I am a beautiful woman.
I gazed on the forest and burned
out the Sahara desert.
With a packet of goat's meat
and a change of clothes,
I crossed it in two hours.
I am a gazelle so swift,
so swift you can't catch me.
For a birthday present when he was three,
I gave my son Hannibal an elephant.
He gave me Rome for mother's day.
My strength flows ever on.
My son Noah built an ark and
I stood proudly at the helm
as we sailed on a soft summer day.
I turned myself into myself and was Jesus.
Men intone my loving name.
All praises all praises,
I am the one who would save.
I sowed diamonds in my back yard.
My bowels deliver uranium.
The filings from my fingernails are
semi-precious jewels.
On a trip north,
I caught a cold and blew
my nose giving oil to the Arab world.
I am so hip even my errors are correct.
I sailed west to reach east and had to round off
the earth as I went.
The hair from my head thinned and gold was laid
across three continents.
I am so perfect so divine so ethereal so surreal.
I cannot be comprehended except by my permission.
I mean...I...can fly
like a bird in the sky...
HAVE YOU EVER FELT THIS?
Peace~
Tuesday, December 4, 2007
Stolen Innocence
Who are you to steal somone's INNOCENCE?
On the train today I saw this beautiful Central American girl – she had dark hair – dark eyes. She must have been 4 years old – she was just swinging around a pole… smiling and laughing… she had no worries in the world – happy about life. The train was her playground and it didn't matter who was around looking – nothing could take away her happiness. She kept playing and playing. In that moment I couldn't help but think of ALL the kids I see daily.
The other day I saw this cute Asian boy sitting next to his mother who slept while he drew these incredible drawings of what I can only imagine will be a video game in the future that he will develop. I also remember this family sitting across from me on the train a little girl, her mom and dad all playing together acting silly – it was beautiful to watch.
Even the little baby in the stroller who was with angry parents who were arguing when the baby looked at me I just smiled and she/he smiled back and in the moment I knew that nothing else mattered but the two of us smiling back and forth while the grown ups were piss't at each other.
But then I recall some other moments I run into children…
Like the little boy who was walking with his father who was happy one minute and then got slapped in the face for speaking…or speaking in a tone the dad didn't like.
Or
The little boy walking with his mother who in Spanish kept telling him when they approached McDonalds - - habre esa puerta - - silve pa algo… (open that door - - be worth something - - or be good for something) by the way the child could only have been like 3 years old.
But the worst moment for me was the day I actually saw a mother slap her child in the face - - just imagine the sounds echoing loudly over 125th street a noise that went through me - - a noise that felt like she just slapped me… SLAP - - OMG it took everything I had not to step to her and say – "why don't you slap me like that. You're such a big woman… so powerful - why don't you pick on somebody your own size." I wanted to beat her ass. Straight up! all I kept thinking was MAN what will that little boy grow up to believe about himself… that he's special - - that he's gifted - - that he can be anything… where will he find his sense of worth when the people closest to him are stripping him of that?
If I had to pick ONE thing is this lifetime to fight for… its violence against women and children - - but specifically abuse against CHILDREN.
On the train I couldn't help but think of all the little girls in the world who aren't happy…who don't know love…who don't know their worth…who don't know their beauty…and they don't know this because there aren't enough people around them to tell them so.
I hate the news but I started replaying footage in my mind of the latest news events:
Father leaving his girlfriends house asks to hold the baby (who is weeks old) he wanted to hold her for one last time… he took that baby and slammed the babies head into the railing on the steps in front of the house.
Or the little girl, who was chained to a chair and starved to death - - beaten, raped…
A Mother drowns her two kids in the bathtub.
A Father stabs his ex and their four kids.
I DON'T UNDERSTAND!!!
Then I went digging curious about what's happening around the world:
<em>Example 1: 11/7/07 Foreigners held in little girl's murder, rape case
By ANDREW SAGAYAM / GOMBAK: Police have arrested four foreigners in connection with the brutal murder and rape of nine-year-old Preeshena Varshiny.
Example 2: 10/2006 / Amish school shooting / From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia / Location Bart Township, Pennsylvania, United States / Target(s) West Nickel Mines School / Date Monday, October 2, 2006 / Attack type School shooting, mass murder, murder-suicide, massacre
Weapon(s) shotgun, handgun / Deaths 6 (including the perpetrator) / Injured 5 / Perpetrator(s) Charles Carl Roberts IV / The Amish school shooting occurred on the morning of Monday, October 2, 2006, when a gunman took hostages and eventually killed five girls (aged 7–13) and then killed himself at West Nickel Mines School, a one-room Amish schoolhouse in Nickel Mines, a village in Bart Township of Lancaster County, Pennsylvania, United States.[1][2][3][4][5] Police report that the gunman was Charles Carl Roberts IV,[5][6] a 32-year-old milk-tank truck driver who lived nearby.
Example 3: http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,311537,00.html
Arizona Girl Beaten, Left Dead for Days in Apartment With Sister
Tuesday, November 13, 2007 / PHOENIX — A 12-year-old girl was beaten with an electrical cord, and her parents left her dead body on the floor of her bedroom for days before they called 911, according to court documents released Tuesday.
Police also found the girl's 9-year-old sister in the apartment when they arrived. Officers said the sister was "cowering in the shower with several bruises, burns and a broken arm," according to court documents.
The 9-year-old gave police a different account as to how her big sister died.
She told police that she saw Troupe make her sister go into the tub. She said Troupe poured hot water on her sister as punishment for not cleaning her room.
The 9-year-old said she heard her sister scream and get out of the tub. She saw her step-mom whip her sister with an extension cord. Troupe then pushed the 12-year-old against the wall and punched her stepdaughter in the face until she passed out.
Afterward, the 9-year-old said she put her hand on her sister's heart and did not feel anything, according to court documents.
The girl also said Troupe previously beat her and her sister.
http://www.azcentral.com/news/articles/1121sistersabused21-on.html
Girl beaten, doused with hot water to be laid to rest
Associated Press and The Arizona Republic /Nov. 21, 2007 07:04 AM
A 12-year-old girl who died after she was beaten with an electrical cord and doused with hot water as punishment for not doing her homework will be laid to rest Wednesday.
Example 4: http://www.dnaindia.com/report.asp?newsid=1137218
Class VI girl beaten by teacher, suffers fracture / Tuesday, December 04, 2007 20:11 IST / JAMMU: In yet another instance of corporal punishment despite the law proscribing it, a class VI girl was allegedly beaten mercilessly by her teacher for not getting a high score in a school test. She has fractured the fingers of her right hand, is in a state of shock and is too scared to go back to school.
Example 5: In the New York Times
Child Deaths in Shelters Are Rising / By LESLIE KAUFMAN
Twenty children died in shelters during the three-year period from 2004 to 2006, with by far the most — 12 — dying in 2006, the report said.
November 29, 2007
Example 6: African Crucible: Cast as Witches, Then Cast Out / By SHARON LAFRANIERE / A surprising number of children in some countries are identified as witches and beaten, abused or abandoned.
November 15, 2007
Example 7: I found a site with a news feed titled: Child Sexual Abuse in the News http://www.darkness2light.org/news/news.asp
Example 8: http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/europe/article714680.ece
From The Times May 9, 2006 / Child murders shock villagers
Neighbors view each other with suspicion after two separate incidents in rural France / By Adam Sage / ANGER, shock and suspicion hung over rural France yesterday after the murders of two young children who were snatched from their parents in separate incidents over the weekend. A four-year-old boy was raped and murdered while his parents were participating in a young farmers' dance in their village hall in central France.
There is not a day I don't think about abuse toward children. It's not just these vicious attacks toward children that upsets me - - it's where it actually begins for children - - in the home.
PARENTS/ADULTS/AUTHORITY FIGURES these are the people I am ANGRY at!
I keep recalling moments in my own life when children could be playing having a good time – happy as can be - - and an adult will come in the room - - piss't off at life - angry at the cards that are dealt them and they bring that poison home and put it on the kids. I am guilty of this… I may not put my hands on my daughter but she has been the target of a lot of my aggression that NEVER has anything to do with her - - I have had moments when I have hated the world - - and I have punished my daughter when she is NOT the person to blame. For that and for any time I have hurt someone as powerless as me - - I am sorry.
What is it about being in that role that gives people the right to put there hands on a human being regardless of the age. And I am not talking just beating children, raping children… I include verbal, mental and emotional abuse… the words that destroy children.
What gives them the right to rob them of their innocence?
Peace~
On the train today I saw this beautiful Central American girl – she had dark hair – dark eyes. She must have been 4 years old – she was just swinging around a pole… smiling and laughing… she had no worries in the world – happy about life. The train was her playground and it didn't matter who was around looking – nothing could take away her happiness. She kept playing and playing. In that moment I couldn't help but think of ALL the kids I see daily.
The other day I saw this cute Asian boy sitting next to his mother who slept while he drew these incredible drawings of what I can only imagine will be a video game in the future that he will develop. I also remember this family sitting across from me on the train a little girl, her mom and dad all playing together acting silly – it was beautiful to watch.
Even the little baby in the stroller who was with angry parents who were arguing when the baby looked at me I just smiled and she/he smiled back and in the moment I knew that nothing else mattered but the two of us smiling back and forth while the grown ups were piss't at each other.
But then I recall some other moments I run into children…
Like the little boy who was walking with his father who was happy one minute and then got slapped in the face for speaking…or speaking in a tone the dad didn't like.
Or
The little boy walking with his mother who in Spanish kept telling him when they approached McDonalds - - habre esa puerta - - silve pa algo… (open that door - - be worth something - - or be good for something) by the way the child could only have been like 3 years old.
But the worst moment for me was the day I actually saw a mother slap her child in the face - - just imagine the sounds echoing loudly over 125th street a noise that went through me - - a noise that felt like she just slapped me… SLAP - - OMG it took everything I had not to step to her and say – "why don't you slap me like that. You're such a big woman… so powerful - why don't you pick on somebody your own size." I wanted to beat her ass. Straight up! all I kept thinking was MAN what will that little boy grow up to believe about himself… that he's special - - that he's gifted - - that he can be anything… where will he find his sense of worth when the people closest to him are stripping him of that?
If I had to pick ONE thing is this lifetime to fight for… its violence against women and children - - but specifically abuse against CHILDREN.
On the train I couldn't help but think of all the little girls in the world who aren't happy…who don't know love…who don't know their worth…who don't know their beauty…and they don't know this because there aren't enough people around them to tell them so.
I hate the news but I started replaying footage in my mind of the latest news events:
Father leaving his girlfriends house asks to hold the baby (who is weeks old) he wanted to hold her for one last time… he took that baby and slammed the babies head into the railing on the steps in front of the house.
Or the little girl, who was chained to a chair and starved to death - - beaten, raped…
A Mother drowns her two kids in the bathtub.
A Father stabs his ex and their four kids.
I DON'T UNDERSTAND!!!
Then I went digging curious about what's happening around the world:
<em>Example 1: 11/7/07 Foreigners held in little girl's murder, rape case
By ANDREW SAGAYAM / GOMBAK: Police have arrested four foreigners in connection with the brutal murder and rape of nine-year-old Preeshena Varshiny.
Example 2: 10/2006 / Amish school shooting / From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia / Location Bart Township, Pennsylvania, United States / Target(s) West Nickel Mines School / Date Monday, October 2, 2006 / Attack type School shooting, mass murder, murder-suicide, massacre
Weapon(s) shotgun, handgun / Deaths 6 (including the perpetrator) / Injured 5 / Perpetrator(s) Charles Carl Roberts IV / The Amish school shooting occurred on the morning of Monday, October 2, 2006, when a gunman took hostages and eventually killed five girls (aged 7–13) and then killed himself at West Nickel Mines School, a one-room Amish schoolhouse in Nickel Mines, a village in Bart Township of Lancaster County, Pennsylvania, United States.[1][2][3][4][5] Police report that the gunman was Charles Carl Roberts IV,[5][6] a 32-year-old milk-tank truck driver who lived nearby.
Example 3: http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,311537,00.html
Arizona Girl Beaten, Left Dead for Days in Apartment With Sister
Tuesday, November 13, 2007 / PHOENIX — A 12-year-old girl was beaten with an electrical cord, and her parents left her dead body on the floor of her bedroom for days before they called 911, according to court documents released Tuesday.
Police also found the girl's 9-year-old sister in the apartment when they arrived. Officers said the sister was "cowering in the shower with several bruises, burns and a broken arm," according to court documents.
The 9-year-old gave police a different account as to how her big sister died.
She told police that she saw Troupe make her sister go into the tub. She said Troupe poured hot water on her sister as punishment for not cleaning her room.
The 9-year-old said she heard her sister scream and get out of the tub. She saw her step-mom whip her sister with an extension cord. Troupe then pushed the 12-year-old against the wall and punched her stepdaughter in the face until she passed out.
Afterward, the 9-year-old said she put her hand on her sister's heart and did not feel anything, according to court documents.
The girl also said Troupe previously beat her and her sister.
http://www.azcentral.com/news/articles/1121sistersabused21-on.html
Girl beaten, doused with hot water to be laid to rest
Associated Press and The Arizona Republic /Nov. 21, 2007 07:04 AM
A 12-year-old girl who died after she was beaten with an electrical cord and doused with hot water as punishment for not doing her homework will be laid to rest Wednesday.
Example 4: http://www.dnaindia.com/report.asp?newsid=1137218
Class VI girl beaten by teacher, suffers fracture / Tuesday, December 04, 2007 20:11 IST / JAMMU: In yet another instance of corporal punishment despite the law proscribing it, a class VI girl was allegedly beaten mercilessly by her teacher for not getting a high score in a school test. She has fractured the fingers of her right hand, is in a state of shock and is too scared to go back to school.
Example 5: In the New York Times
Child Deaths in Shelters Are Rising / By LESLIE KAUFMAN
Twenty children died in shelters during the three-year period from 2004 to 2006, with by far the most — 12 — dying in 2006, the report said.
November 29, 2007
Example 6: African Crucible: Cast as Witches, Then Cast Out / By SHARON LAFRANIERE / A surprising number of children in some countries are identified as witches and beaten, abused or abandoned.
November 15, 2007
Example 7: I found a site with a news feed titled: Child Sexual Abuse in the News http://www.darkness2light.org/news/news.asp
Example 8: http://www.timesonline.co.uk/tol/news/world/europe/article714680.ece
From The Times May 9, 2006 / Child murders shock villagers
Neighbors view each other with suspicion after two separate incidents in rural France / By Adam Sage / ANGER, shock and suspicion hung over rural France yesterday after the murders of two young children who were snatched from their parents in separate incidents over the weekend. A four-year-old boy was raped and murdered while his parents were participating in a young farmers' dance in their village hall in central France.
There is not a day I don't think about abuse toward children. It's not just these vicious attacks toward children that upsets me - - it's where it actually begins for children - - in the home.
PARENTS/ADULTS/AUTHORITY FIGURES these are the people I am ANGRY at!
I keep recalling moments in my own life when children could be playing having a good time – happy as can be - - and an adult will come in the room - - piss't off at life - angry at the cards that are dealt them and they bring that poison home and put it on the kids. I am guilty of this… I may not put my hands on my daughter but she has been the target of a lot of my aggression that NEVER has anything to do with her - - I have had moments when I have hated the world - - and I have punished my daughter when she is NOT the person to blame. For that and for any time I have hurt someone as powerless as me - - I am sorry.
What is it about being in that role that gives people the right to put there hands on a human being regardless of the age. And I am not talking just beating children, raping children… I include verbal, mental and emotional abuse… the words that destroy children.
What gives them the right to rob them of their innocence?
Peace~
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