So the past few days have been pretty rough. I have been going / growing through some life stuff. Some good, some not so good… some incredibly GREAT and POWERFUL!
Yesterday in the midst of some life upset I decided to open up a book my friend Tamara has on her nightstand: Until Today, Daily Devotions for Spiritual Growth and Peace of Mind, by Author, Iyanla Vanzant
I know I don’t need to say it… but I LOVE IYANLA... I’ve been reading her for over ten years when I received my first copy of In the Meantime… in the meantime I have about (3) copies of 40 Days and 40 Nights, and 2 copies of almost every book in addition to meditation cards all highlighted and underlined who I quote throughout my memoir, Finding Your Force A Journey to Love...
I decided to trust my instinct and open UNTIL TODAY on any page and see what message came up for me… and I opened it to September 28th … This image is that reading:
Some of things that rose for me were:
“I experience and express the power of trust because… ALL of my debts have been paid.” Iyanla Vanzant
The body shift for me is that I finally… FINALLY understand that I am PAID in FULL. I am done with all of that… I am done with all of IT… with my past… with my pain… with ALL OF IT! I AM DONE! It’s time to move on… It’s time to move differently. It’s time to have ALL that I deserve! And I am open to receive ALL OF IT! I AM WORTHY OF IT! I DESERVE IT! I have worked hard for it!
I AM ENTITLED TO IT!
From the three messages, Iyanla writes:
“I suffer so that you don’t have to…”
What I heard was:
I will NEVER FEAR people or circumstances!
I will NEVER FEAR what people can do to me or how I will survive what happens to me!
Something / some things… happened to me this week that made me question my ability, my integrity and my sense of self. The person who questioned me is actually an old experience… MY OLD STORY creeping up on me to see how I will handle it and how I will choose to get out of this one.
In the 2nd message Iyanla writes:
“Forgive them father for they know not what they do!”
What I heard is:
Some people are not aware of how they DISHONOR me with fear and doubt!
Some people are not aware of how it makes me sad when they do not TRUST me!
Some people are not aware that in dishonoring me, they dishonor THEMSELVES!
Forgive them father… forgive me!
In the last message Iyanla writes:
“IT IS DONE!”
Translated by me… I AM DONE! This is done! We are done! My past is done! IT’S DONE! My debts are paid! I am paid in FULL! This is DONE! Breathe Alicia… ache~
Then I opened to today’s message and here is that reading:
“I AM willing to acknowledge … if I AM not giving my ALL to myself, I am not giving my ALL, at all.” Iyanla Vanzant
So UNTIL today, I am done serving others first… today I sit at the table and feast!
And so it is~
There are things we must ask ourselves in order for change to happen for the shift to occur:
Am I willing to release my past and let go of thoughts that don’t serve me?
What am I willing to do here?
What am I willing to give up to get there?
What am I willing to BE to arrive to where I am destined?
Are you open to all the good that is coming?
I AM learning to replace feelings of anxiety with thoughts and feelings of security, safety, peacefulness, confidence and love.
I look fear, anxiety and self-doubt in the eye and re-center myself grounded in the truth that I AM magnificent!
I AM HUGE and living in the bigness of how powerful I AM and in ALL that I do!!!
I AM exploring the truth of my own beauty~
I AM recognizing the truth of my FULL potential~
I honor the truth that I AM one with my FORCE~
The truth is wherever I AM, GOD IS, and all is well!
And so it is~ Ache~