Thursday, March 13, 2008

I still believe~

Last night while I was walking to the train and while I was on my way home - - I spent quite a bit of time thinking about people in my life and what we all go through at any given moment. I was really thinking about what THAT THING is that gets us through it. What is it that gets us through pain? How do we get past grief? When a relationship ends and we are left devastated and heart broken - - how do we repair – heal – get better – get strong?

I began meditating on the word FAITH. I have these cards with affirmations and this is what I wrote:

Jan. 16, 2004 – Day 16 Faith: Trust, belief a constant trust in my force. A set of principles or beliefs. Confident belief in the truth; value, or trust-worthiness of a person, idea, or thing.

*I acknowledge the importance of living my life by and with faith
*I possess faith
*I am faith-filled
*I am relying on my faith to do all things and I expect great things to happen in my life
*I am always anticipating a miracle
*I am working and living by faith

So it got me thinking about me and what I think about faith.

Do I have faith?
Do I really walk with faith?

I was thinking of a title for this blog and was playing with words… I was trying to think about where I am in my life - - with faith on my side and I said to myself: I still believe~ I always believe~

Then I started singing… this song from the past… "I still believe…"

I still believe are words from one of my favorite songs from the 80s. That singer was amazing. Her name is Brenda K Star. I haven’t really followed her over the years and am not really sure how her music career has gone - - but what I do remember is that Mariah sang back for her and only one of them made it BIG!

So I was thinking about Brenda last night… what happened to her? How did she feel during that time in her life? I wondered if she ever stopped believing in herself. Did she stop believing that success could be hers? Did she think that because Mariah made it big that she was some how limited and now unable to make it.

I’m left wondering if self doubt envy or jealousy was what blocked her. And if something internal did create the block preventing her abundance from arriving. Did it have anything to do with FAITH? Where was her faith?

I’m thinking about what it means to have faith.

What’s a woman of faith?
What was George Michael singing about in his, "so you gotta have faith?"
Why is faith so important?
What do we replace faith with?
Where do we put our faith?
What do we put our faith in?
Do we have faith?
Do I have faith?
Do you have faith?

I wrote this for someone I love last night:

Faith in people
Faith in things
Faith in the process
Faith that all things arrive right on time
Faith in you
Faith in me
Faith in us
Faith in our family
Faith in thy will

I’m thinking about the moments WE - the creator’s children had the gift of faith.

When was it exactly that we lost our faith?

When did we begin to put our faith in things, in feelings, in others and then allow it to easily become DOUBT?

Doubt in people
Doubt in you
Doubt in me
Doubt in the truth
Doubt in things
Doubt in worth
Doubt that we deserve
Doubt that good can’t happen to us

My faith is strong queen

I believe in you
I believe in us
I believe in we
I believe in me
I believe we are meant to be

What do you believe?
Do you have faith?
Where do we put our faith?
What do we put our faith in?


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